Dirty Talk for the Single and Dating PDF
Dirty Talk for the Single and Dating mp3
If you aren’t currently in a long-term relationship, this entire module is for you!
Learning the skill of talking dirty and sharing fantasies is exciting, and using those skills in your love life can be downright intoxicating. When done correctly, it can draw a man to you like a powerless moth to a white-hot flame.
But when done incorrectly, it can backfire miserably.
Look, I don’t want to preach to you about your sexual choices. I am a firm believer in empowering you to enjoy your sexuality on your own terms and timetable. I’ve seen one night stands in Vegas turn into long-term love affairs. Personally, I slept with a man on our second date and we were together for 10 years, including a marriage and two kids.
No matter what, though, it pays to understand some of the possible pitfalls in using the techniques in this program with someone you are newly dating.
Building the foundation only on sex
It is WAY easier in life to find a man to have incredible sex with than it is to find a man to build an incredible life with. Of course, not every single woman is looking for a long-term relationship. But for those of you who are, it is important to not let your sizzling sexual chemistry blind you to red flags of incompatibility.
Now that you have the skills and know how to tap into his unique sexual desires, you have the power to create an intense connection with nearly any man you date. So it becomes that much more important to be aware of the other aspects of who he is and why you want to be with him.
Because a long-term relationship won’t be sustainable purely based on great sex.
Pay attention to the things that indicate whether you really are compatible. Are your life goals harmonious? Do you communicate well? Is he kind? How does he handle his finances? How well do you relate outside of the bedroom? Are your unique quirks and flaws deal breakers?
The bottom line: don’t forget to look beyond the amazing sex to see if there truly is relationship potential.
Not Building Trust
It takes time to know how well you can trust someone, especially when it comes to revealing your private sexual self. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment and share racy fantasies and explicit desires with someone you are attracted to. But if the relationship fizzles quickly, you may be left feeling vulnerable or judged for what you disclosed.
Check in with yourself often. Ask yourself, “If I never heard from him again, would I regret what I’ve shared?” Use that question to decide when it’s right to sleep with him and when it’s right to begin sharing your sexual superpowers.
Scaring Him Off
While some guys yearn for an uninhibited sexual goddess ready to explore raunchy fantasies with him from the get go, there are plenty of men who would feel overwhelmed by that from first romp.
Like this poor guy…
A few years ago, a friend of mine splurged on a pair of thigh-high leather boots with a stiletto heel. She LOVED them and felt uber-sexy strutting around her condo in them. Her boyfriend was also a fan of the boots and frequently requested her to wear them during sex. Well, they broke up and the boots went back in the closet for a bit. Eventually she started dating. She met this really great introverted musician. Very artsy and sensitive. And hot.
The night of their fourth date, it was clear they were going to sleep together. She was tingling with anticipation and couldn’t wait to show him her sexy side.
After dinner and drinks, she invited him to her place. Candles were lit. Music was playing.
Intense kisses were exchanged. She led him to her room and told him to get comfy, she’d be right back.
She emerged from her walk-in closet naked except for her sexy boots. His jaw dropped. She mistook the look of surprise in his eyes for approval. Sure she looked smokin’ hot but the vision of her in these dominatrix-style boots kind of freaked him out. They proceeded to have awkwardly quiet sex.
For the first and only time.
Okay, so chances are they weren’t going to be compatible for the long haul and she eventually met an awesome guy and is happily married now. But there is a lesson to be learned here.
Understanding a man’s sexual style before jumping into a specific fantasy or role-play is important.
He might not be totally tuned in to his own desires… yet
He could be somewhat sexually inexperienced
He may be more romantic (there are men out there who are!)
You want the experience to be mutually enjoyable. If you take a wild guess based on your past sexual relationships without knowing his personal taste, you run the risk of alienating him. Doling out your skills slowly is often the best approach.
If you suspect he is more reserved, let the heat build slowly. Use the Boiled Frog and Erotic Telepathy techniques to pace yourself and discover what he is into so he feels comfortable.
A Note About Texting Photos
It pays to be especially cautious with ANYONE NEW before sending any manner of revealing photos, particularly if the guy is someone you just met and he’s pushing you to send naked photos right from the start. That should be a red flag! Racy texts and sexy photos are a privilege that should only be granted when you have reasonable proof that he is trustworthy.
Remember this rule of thumb: if the idea of the photo getting shared online without your permission scares you to death, don’t send it. Also remember that even so-called “safe” apps like SnapChat (where the pics you send through the app get deleted after a few seconds) aren’t 100% safe from being shared.
How do you handle someone requesting nakey pics?
If he asks for a skin pic, send him a photo of something else, like your knee cap, or your neck, or a photo of a cat (get it… pussy pic? Haha)… something other than what he’s really asking for.
It’s a playful way of saying no.
If he still persists, you can tell him that revealing photos are a privilege reserved for being in a relationship. If he continues to push you, dump him. Seriously. Anyone who doesn’t respect your boundaries is bad news.
Okay, there are cautions, don’ts and pitfalls. So how should you use this program when you are dating?
A new relationship is ripe with opportunities for creating mystery and giving him the thrill of the chase. Use the infancy of the new relationship to your advantage.
Using teasing and innuendo to give him sneak peeks into what’s to come down the road with you. You remain slightly out of reach, which encourages him to pursue you.
Like we talked about in module six, it takes work in a long-term relationship to keep the chase alive. But you have the benefit of mystery and chase when you are dating and starting something new. Don’t squander it by sharing every single amazing trick you know all at the beginning.
This may sound corny, but think of your sexual superpowers as premium bonuses that are earned, like in a video game.
Only when a man reaches a certain level (or milestone) does he get to enjoy that gift or bonus.
This prevents you from sharing too much too soon, which keeps the chase alive and keeps him coming back for more.
These milestones are totally at your discretion, but I do recommend taking care to reveal them over time rather than right out of the gates.
Some natural milestones when dating someone:
- The first handful of dates (some relationships don’t get past date 1 or 2)
- The first time you have sex
- The first time you spend the night together at his/your place
- Deciding to be exclusive
- Saying “I love you”
- Meeting important people (friends, kids, parents)
- Going on vacation or a getaway together
- Talking about the future (moving in, marriage, etc.)
As your relationship progresses through these milestones, you can introduce different techniques.
Some of these you’ve already read, some will be in upcoming modules (those are marked with an *).
Techniques to use without sex:
- The Cuddle Hormone (it can just be doing fun activities and not ending the night with sex)
- The Boiled Frog (highly recommend using this one!)
- *Invisible Chastity Belt (it can just be a super hot-n-heavy make-out and leave out oral if you choose)
- Techniques you can use when you are newly sleeping with a man (first 1-3 months):
- The Madonna Moan
- Pavlov’s Erection
- Oral Intensifier
- *No Touch Lay
- *Erotic Telepathy
Techniques that work best once trust and a relationship has been established (3-6 months or later):
- Tease Intensifier
- Verbal Viagra
- *50 Shades of Experimenting
- *Lust Mirror
And if you are stuck in dating purgatory with a man who isn’t suggesting moving the relationship forward, you need to pay close attention to the next lesson: Monogamous Male Maximizer.
Flirty (and a little dirty) texts for the beginning
I am a HUGE believer in using texting when you are dating someone. It’s a fantastic medium for flirting and letting him know he’s on your mind.
There are lots of text phrases in all of the techniques I teach you, and they go from flirty to downright raunchy. But if you are newly dating someone, many of those raunchy ones would be coming on way too strong.
You can certainly modify any of the lessons to suit your personal taste and save some of the more explicit material for later on in a relationship.
However, I think setting the tone early on with flirting via text is important. You want to establish early on that texting will be a fun way to play together. So here are some tried and true texts to use when you want to flirt without getting (too) dirty when you’ve just begun to date someone.
Flirty (and slightly dirty) Attention Grabbers
Stop…
…distracting me 😉
…turning me on, I can’t concentrate 😉
…filling my mind with naughty thoughts 😉
…thinking about me. Get back to work 😉
Mmmm…
…I am thinking some very yummy things about you right now
…I keep thinking of your amazing kisses
…you are awfully cute, you know that?
Are you…
…blushing? You should be based on what I’m thinking 😉
…rested up? I plan to exhaust you on Saturday 😉
…turned on like I am? Wow.
Damn…
…thoughts of you have me smiling today
…I am so turned on by you
…I can’t wait to be in bed with you
Know what?
…I can’t wait to feel your kisses
…you are one sexy man 😉
…I just got out of the shower. Enjoy that visual 😉
Can I just tell you…
…your arms are damn sexy
…you have me very turned on
…how good you looked the other night?
Tell me something…
…do we look good together or what?
…why are you so damn seductive? 😉
…how much are you looking forward to next time? 😉
A Little Dirtier Texts
What would you do…
…if you were here right now?
…if I was there with you?
…if we were alone right now?
I can’t stop thinking about…
…how my body responds to your touch
…the things I want to do to you
…the things I want you to do to me
…all of the places I could kiss you 😉
Imagine this…
…me running my fingers through your hair as we kiss
…me nibbling your neck and slowly working my mouth down your body
…you touching my soft skin, exploring my neck… shoulders… back…
I can’t wait to…
…feel your body next to mine, skin to skin…
…pounce on you when I see you! 😉
…have you in my bed, alone, and uninterrupted…
…make you my sexy love slave 😉
…run my hands over every inch of you
His replies may run the gamut. He might read your flirty message and be off to the races getting dirty right away.
One friend of mine tried out a cute flirty text on a new guy and he sent her a pic of his erection.
Another friend sent a flirty text, and he launched into describing how badly he wanted to lick her pussy.
If that happens to you, you don’t have to engage with him at that explicit level if you don’t want to. A simple cooling text works…
- Whoa there! Let’s save some for later 😉
- Oh you are so naughty 😉
- Slow down mister, plenty of time for all of those activities 😉
- I’ve got you really turned on huh? Naughty me 😉
And then let him know that you have to get back to work or take a call or leave for an appointment. Something to end the conversation.
He also may be a little uncertain how to respond, too. So if his reply is sweet, keep things closer to the PG-level for now (and if that’s the case, use The Boiled Frog for sure!).
